A song co-written by Mother Cecilia: "Rebuild My Church"

Mother Cecilia shares about a song she co-wrote which was recently released online:

I am excited to share with you this song which I co-wrote with a spiritual brother of mine, Deacon Joe Menkhaus, a transitional deacon for the Diocese of Cleveland (meaning, he is in his final period of formation for the priesthood). I never imagined I would do such a thing, but it’s been such a joyful and life-giving process. I’m really happy to share it with you, and I hope it blesses you. Here is the story behind the song:

About two years ago, Deacon Joe and I were talking about my poetry, and I asked him, “If I wrote a rhyming poem, could you turn it into a song?” (I knew that he had written some songs.) He replied, “Sure!” So, I decided that I wanted to write lyrics that would be meaningful to both of us. Around that same time, while Deacon Joe was on his internship assignment at a parish, one of the priests there was arrested for illegal activity, and this priest has since been sentenced to life in prison. Scandal in the Church has touched both my life and Deacon Joe’s life in multiple ways. As a Byzantine Catholic, I also find myself suffering in the middle of the schism in the Church between Catholics and Orthodox. So, one day while praying during one of my monthly poustinia retreats, I was suddenly inspired and wrote these lyrics.

Deacon Joe found that he wasn’t able to turn my lyrics into a song (because this wasn't the usual way he wrote music), so later on I sang for him a melody that came to me. Then he was able to do something with it, and he adapted the lyrics and the melody and made it into something quite nice! We again set it aside, but recently he was inspired to record it so that we could share it with others and encourage others in their prayer and struggles in the midst of continuing scandals throughout the Church. In the recording, Deacon Joe sings and plays the guitar, his brother Max plays the piano (and did a lot of the work mixing the song), and I sing harmony (which is another miracle, because I’ve almost never sung harmony!).

My hope is that people will listen to the song in a spirit of prayer, open to the ways that the Holy Spirit may be calling them to pray and fast for the Church, and most importantly, to be love in the midst of suffering and division.

Anyone can listen to the song for free on YouTube. It is also available on Spotify and Apple Music. Feel free to share with others who may be blessed by it!

"Be poor with Me: reflections on poverty"

Today is the first day of the 40-day Nativity Fast (or "Philip's Fast," because it begins on the eve of the feast of the Apostle Philip). Today we begin to prepare our hearts to receive Jesus in the Incarnation, who enters into our physical and spiritual poverty and takes on the poverty of our humanity. 

As we begin this fast, we offer for your reflection a video that we produced this year and just released this past weekend for our Bridegroom's Banquet. It is called, "Be poor with Me: reflections on poverty." We hope that it will help to set the spiritual tone of your preparations for Christmas.

A Letter from Sr. Natalia

Glory to Jesus Christ!

Beloved Friends and Family,

As I was praying very intentionally with the profession service on my pre-profession retreat, I was moved to share part of those reflections with all of you. I find that there is a common misconception at the tonsure of a monastic that I’d like to clarify. I know that some come to this service thinking, “Wow. How beautiful! This woman is giving up all the goods and beauties of the world for the sake of the Lord. This is the epitome of virtue. Of holiness. She is entering the life of holiness.” There are truths in all of this, but really none of these capture the fullness of what a monastic tonsure is, and I think they can even distract us from the reality of what you will witness today.

As Sr. Petra and I come down the aisle in our simple white garment (which we will be buried in some day), we are barefoot. Hair untied. Hands crossed across our chest as though they were bound. Because at this point we are bound—by our own sin. We walk down the aisle totally poor, with nothing to offer but ourselves. And as we make our three prostrations (a sign of penance), the hymn being sung is not “Here Comes the Bride,” but it is the troparion of the Prodigal Son. Proclaiming our deep sinfulness, and our deep need for mercy. I remember when a monk, who has been fully professed for many years, gave a retreat at our monastery. He said, “When you are making that final prostration, and you are praying to be received into the ranks of the penitent, your prayer should be, ‘Lord, I need this life of healing. I need this life of recovery.’” This is very similar to what St. John Climacus writes in the Ladder of Divine Ascent, “Let no one, by appealing to the weight and multitude of his sins, say that he is unworthy of the monastic vow...Where there is much corruption, considerable treatment is needed to draw out all the impurity. The healthy do not go to a hospital.” At the ordination of a Byzantine deacon or priest, when they receive each article of their vestments, the priests and people cry out, “Axios!” meaning “He is worthy!” You will notice today that when Sr. Petra and I receive each article of monastic clothing, the priests and people cry out, “Lord have mercy!”

Please don’t misunderstand me. Though this is a day in which Sr. Petra and I enter the ranks of penitents and promise a life of self-denial, it is by no means a gloomy day. On the contrary, it is a day of great rejoicing. But I firmly believe the joy is that of Luke 15:7, “Just so, I tell you, there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance.” In this sense, today you are all joining in with the rejoicing of the angels over two sinners who desire to transform their prodigal pursuit of sin to the prodigal love of their Bridegroom.

Please pray for us that we may fully embrace this life of joyful penance. And be assured of our prayers for each of you as well.

In Christ our Bridegroom,

Sr. Natalia

See the previous post for more information about the upcoming life profession of Sr. Natalia and Sr. Petra on Sept. 26.

Olivia's Entrance

The following will also be published in our upcoming issue of Pomegranate Blossoms:

Olivia Kijauskas was received into the monastery as a dokimos on May 12, 2021, during Vespers for the feast of the Ascension. In a short service after the Old Testament readings for the feast, two special readings were added, then Bishop Milan prayed a prayer of blessing over her: “…bless the good intention of this Your handmaiden, Olivia, and grant a good beginning to her time in this monastery….” The bishop then blessed the head covering and cross that she will wear during this period (one to two years). It is tradition that the youngest member of the monastery (in monastic years) helps the new dokimos to put on these items of clothing.

The Ascension is the feast in which we celebrate Jesus being “taken up in glory” (troparion of the feast) and taking our human nature to the right hand of the Father. At first glance, it seems sad that Jesus is leaving His disciples, but He is actually even closer to them after His Ascension, for He ascended to the throne of God which is in their hearts by the power of the Holy Spirit. In Bishop Milan’s remarks at the end of Vespers, he exclaimed that what Olivia has done by entering the monastery is “an offense to the world.” In the homily during the Divine Liturgy for the feast the next morning, Fr. Michael O’Loughlin (visiting from the Proto-Cathedral of St. Mary, Sherman Oaks, Ca.) recalled these words of Bishop Milan and said, “Yes, the world is offended, because you’ve said to it, ‘You are not enough for me.’” Just as Jesus said to his disciples, “It’s better for you if I go” (Jn 16:7), Fr. Michael continued, “Olivia, it’s better for the world that you’ve left it. …This is an example to all of us: the world is not enough [to fulfill us].”

During this first stage of monastic formation, Olivia will be close in spirit to those she loves in the world, though her communication with them will be limited for the sake of her deepening relationship with Christ. As she continues to discern her vocation, please pray for her that she will become a witness of the joy of surrendering everything to God. Below, you can learn a little more about Olivia.

Age: 23 

College & degree: Cleveland State University (Class of 2020), Bachelor of Arts in Studio Art

A few favorite saints: John the Baptist, John the Beloved, Onuphrius the Great

Some favorite activities & interests: Hiking, looking at gardens, listening to old, quiet jazz, taking in beauty any way I can and creating beauty any way I'm called to

How did you meet the nuns of our monastery? 

I met the nuns during my freshman year of high school. The youth minister at my parish introduced me to them at an event in the Diocese of Cleveland, and he asked them to pray over me for me vocation. I had absolutely no idea where that introduction would lead!

 

Where did you grow up and go to church? What drew you to the Byzantine Catholic Church as an adult?

I grew up in Euclid, Ohio, at Saints Robert and William Roman Catholic Parish. In high school, I was really involved in my parish's LifeTeen group, and through that, I learned a lot about our faith. As my faith grew, it started to look more and more Byzantine without me realizing it. Eventually, I found my way to St. Stephen's Byzantine Catholic Church in Euclid (now Holy Resurrection Parish), for a talk by Fr. Michael Lee. As he spoke about Eastern traditions, my heart was burning within me. I knew I had found others who loved what I loved. I attended that parish for just over four years before entering the monastery. 

 

What attracted you to discern your vocation with our monastery?

When I was in high school, whenever I saw the nuns at any event around the Cleveland area, my eyes completely lit up, and I wanted to be close to them. I couldn't help it; it was simply the natural movement of my heart. I think I saw the nuns’ joy, their striving for holiness, and just loved who they were. I also knew that they loved me, long before I began discerning with them, and this love was free; I was even completely free to step away from discernment for a while at one point a couple years ago, and as you can see, I was completely welcome to come back, or else I wouldn't be here today. 

What is something you look forward to during this time of discernment as a dokimos?

As my relationship with the nuns has deepened over the years, I've been able to see some ways they've each been uniquely called closer to the Bridegroom. I'm excited to see what that will look like for me. 

Recording of "The Noble Joseph"

We hope you enjoy this beautiful choral piece we learned this year! This version of "The Noble Joseph," which is sung during the procession with the burial shroud during Vespers for Great & Holy Friday, is one of Mother Cecilia's favorite pieces that she remembers the choir singing at her home parish, St. Joseph in Brecksville, Ohio. We hope it draws you into prayer!

(Arranged by Fr. Michael Staurovsky when he was serving at St. Joseph church in 1966; adapted into English by Michael Karaffa, former choir director of the St. Joseph parish choir) 

The Silence of the Cross: At the anniversary of the pandemic

As we celebrate this Sunday of the Veneration of the Cross, marking the half-way point of the Great Fast, let's reflect for a moment on the silence of the Cross. Though Jesus spoke much in His public ministry, when it comes time for His passion and death, He is almost completely silent. The offering of Himself is greater than words. The mystery is veiled and reverenced by silence. 

It also happens that we come now to the one-year anniversary of the beginning of the coronavirus pandemic in the United States and a year full of many types of sad divisions. Of course, in the face of conflict, sometimes we must be courageous and speak up, but often we are invited by God to make an offering of ourselves in silent suffering. This offering is one He often asks monastics to make, but He asks you as well. One of the nuns of our monastery recently wrote this poem, and she shares it with you to encourage you in those moments when the greatest offering you can make is a gift of exterior and interior silence in the face of division.

The Power of Silence

This opinion

I hold so dear;

the stance I stake,

confident in my correctness;

that argument

which will trounce

the illogic of my opponents—

what if

I offered them all

as a holocaust

in the silent flames

on the altar of the Your Heart?

What if,

thus stripped,

I willingly joined myself

to the failure of Your Cross?

Not by words

are the powers of the earth subdued,

but by love

speechless as the Lamb.                    

Then let me not strive

to make my point

or build a case.

Let me not fight

noise with noise.

Let me be humble

in all I think I know.

The universe wordlessly

declares Your glory.

My self-satisfied assertions

add nothing.

Even true words

can drown out Your Voice:

In quietness and trust

shall be your strength.

Be still and know

that I am God.

So as the conflict

roars around me,

and Your Body is torn

by division and pride,

accept my silence

as healing oil

poured over You

like nard

from the emptied vessel

of my heart.

Winter Newsletter: "Weakness: a Path to Holiness"

In this issue of Pomegranate Blossoms, we focus on the theme of weakness. Mother Cecilia writes about the problem with hagiography (idealizing biographies of saints), we reflect on several saints with obvious weaknesses--and what they can teach us, we recommend a few books related to the topic, and more! We hope that this issue helps you to grow in your relationship with God.